It's 21 of July. It really been a long time since my last entry.
I was busy..I think this is the only reason and the only excuse that I can give.
One week seven days, working for five days....after work I've become so lazy and really not feel like coming out.
Am I really don't want to come out? Or, it's because of there's no one that I can hang out with?
You know, I find myself quite funny, sometimes.
Once, I told some of my friends that I am an optimistic person. There's always a voice within me will support and encourage myself when I need it. But...eventually, the voice is getting softer and softer.
Yes, I have to admit, I am a think-too-much person. There's many times that the situation is not as worse or is not as bad but I will make it so bad that not only making myself suffer but making people around me feel bad. Hurting them..and making them no confident in me.
I dunno. Really. What is the reason that causing me so. Is it I am like this for all the while or, it just some reasons that leading me so.
I am tired of thinking so much.
It's tiring to worry so much....I can tell others so clearly, think positively, submit to God.
But, it's really not easy.
It's been four and the half months I came back here, a lovely island that I was born.
But, things are just so not right for this time.
Maybe I need more time?
Maybe I gotta be more transparent towards them?
Maybe I should not think so much but just insist on my stand?
O, Lord.....strengthen me...guide me and be with me....
I know, there's always hope and future.